Thorns Of A Prickly Rose
by Psychedelicate Poltergeist
Summary: Itachi and Deidara are dating, and Sasori doesn't like it one bit. What does he do? Very disturbing things. (ItaDei, SasoDei, Yandere!Sasori, oneshot)
1. Thorns of a Prickly Rose

A/N: Before we begin, you might wanna know that this is absolutely not something you'd wanna read if you're squeamish or anything. This SasoDei fic, unlike my others, is neither fluffy nor angsty but, in fact, scary, and contains quite a bit of guts and gore. In this fic, Sasori is yandere for Deidara. Those who don't know what a yandere is, it's someone who takes desperate, psychotic measures to keep their loved one close to them. Think of Yuno Gasai from Future Diary. Yeah, Sasori's kinda like her, here.

If nightmarish stuff doesn't faze you, and you like yanderes, happy reading!

P.S. Spoiler warning in regards to Tobi's identity... kinda.

-xxx-

**_Thorns of a Prickly Rose_**

-xxx-

Sasori's patience was wearing thin. He'd already slapped his partner with Hiruko's sharp scorpion tail and yet the blond still wouldn't shut up about his crush on Itachi. Two weeks ago he was into Tobi; now his admiration for him had magically disappeared and he favoured Itachi instead. Deidara liking guys wasn't entirely unusual; Sasori had inferred on the day they met that he was gay. His blond hair was so long and his mannerisms were so enthusiastic and flamboyant that Sasori had honestly mistaken him for a girl at first.

"...I wonder what he'll say when I tell him, un. Would today be a good idea or should I wait it out?"

The puppeteer hissed under his breath. "You know that I have no experience with screwing other males, let alone females," he said, genuinely emotionless.

"I'm not asking for sex tips! I could use some, but first I need to tell him my feelings, un. Maybe he likes me, maybe he doesn't, so I need to find out!"

"Well, don't come crying to me when something goes wrong."

"If he doesn't love me, it's okay, I can handle it, Danna."

Sasori snorted in disbelief.

-xxx-

"I did it, Danna, un! I told him my feelings! And guess what? He likes me back!"

Sasori nearly dropped his tools and papers. This simple occurence was quite unusual. Deidara had an annoying habit of bounding into their shared bedroom and loudly shouting at the most unexpected times. Sasori got used to this very quickly and learnt to just ignore the brat and focus on whatever project he was currently working on. The one time he was startled, however, didn't have anything to do with Deidara's annoyingly ear-splitting voice, but rather the news that he'd delivered.

"Good for you," the sentient puppet murmured frostily, returning his attention to his work. He didn't care that Itachi and Deidara were dating now, or that was what he was trying to convince himself. He wasn't interested in romance, he liked neither Deidara nor Itachi, and he had no reason whatsoever to be jealous. Besides, they were going to die eventually, whilist Sasori was immortal. Neither of them had any way of living forever; in a century's time they would wither and die while Sasori was still as alive as he had always been.

That is, assuming neither of them would die in battle.

That was the entire reason why Sasori chose to trade his life as a human for an eternal, carefree puppet life. Art, he'd always decided, was an eternal thing: never to die, never to wither, never to disappear. Humans were quite capable of living for almost a century, but that was the furthest a mortal could make it. And even when they died, their corpses would decay in time until all that was left were dry, fragile bones.

Sasori glanced quickly to his partner. He thought the opposite and wanted to die fleetingly. Because getting blown up at a young age was such an artistic way to kick the bucket.

He started to wonder what it would be like if Deidara found a way to become eternal and the two of them lived several centuries together. That would never happen, however; the stubborn blond would never agree with his beliefs of eternal art and even if he did, Sasori might somehow kill him because he was still the most annoying human being he'd ever met.

But... Deidara could still be eternal. All Sasori had to do was make him as such. He wouldn't be able to walk or talk or be annoying in any way, but his silky blond hair, his cerulean eyes and his bright smile would never die.

Huh. Sasori had never thought of his associate as beautiful before. Maybe he was in love after all...

-xxx-

Itachi had harderned so, so much over the years. He was never a. sweet little cutie to begin with, but he was an introverted though friendly child prodigy at least. Everyone in Akatsuki knew that he'd led a terrible life, and it was the reason why, when it came to his outlook on the world, he wore jade-tinted spectacles the entire time. He believed that closeness to others hurt you in the long run, which was why he was so cold and distant.

That was why Sasori was not used to the sight of him gently kissing Deidara's temple as the two of them bade each other goodnight. Eerily enough, the Uchiha's expression remained blank throughout the entire exchange. He needed to know his motives for dating Deidara.

But still, his plan had to come into action tonight.

Sasori waited impatiently as Deidara went about getting ready for bed, removing his Akatsuki cloak, shoes, forehead protector and half ponytail as he climbed into bed. The younger boy yawned a goodnight to his partner and finally drifted off to sleep.

Once he was sure that he was asleep, Sasori cautiously lifted up the blond's body and carried him down to his chilling, putrid workshop where he created and stored his precious creations. Because he'd diminished his senses of touch and smell long ago, the sickening, foul room never fazed him.

He placed the blond carefully down on the icy metal bench that millions before had laid down upon to face the exact same fate. Disarming him wasn't necessary since he always put his clay bombs and explosives in a pouch on his bedside table. Stupid brat... what if there was a surprise attack in the night? Or someone tried to murder him in his sleep? That wasn't what Sasori was going to do. Converting mortals into marionettes wasn't murder, it was merely working on a masterpiece that would never die.

Fortunately, Deidara wasn't too light of a sleeper. Upon being placed on Sasori's workbench, he'd only sighed in content, indulging in his dreamland. Sasori still wasn't fazed, however, even at the possible knowledge that the bomber may be dreaming of Itachi at this very moment.

Sasori took a vial of one of his many poisons and a senbon, poured the posion into the senbon, and then proceeded in injecting it into Deidara. While the blonde was indeed already unconsious, he still had a chance of waking up midway through his work and thus disturbing the process of what he was doing. The poison he had just used specialised more in keeping the victim stupefied than killing them from the inside, as though it were a depressant drug. He rarely used this poison because he used his other poisons in battle and the people he took back to the hideout were usually weakened enough that he could convert them without interruption.

When this task was done, the puppeteer took out a gleaming silver scalpel and used it to carefully slice open Deidara's abdomen. He was already developing a sick, twisted slasher smile as he grabbed onto the bomber's intestines and dropped them into a glass jar with a nauseating plop.

The psychotic grin remained on his normally stoic face for the rest of that night as he worked. By the time the sun rose, Deidara was now wooden, rigid, eternal, beautiful...

The slasher smile then faded at last to make way for a rare gentle one that no one in Akatsuki had ever seen on him. Sasori activated his chakra strings as he attached them to his latest creation and skillfully willed the marionette to sit up. Glassy blue eyes focused their full and utmost attention on him – just as he'd wanted.

With a flick of chakra strings, Deidara swung his legs over the bench and stood. He then walked directly over to his master and placed an unfeeling hand intimately at his chin.

"Hi, Dei," Sasori murmured affectionately. "It's okay, Itachi's not here now. You'll be with me for all eternity. You will never have to set your sights on anyone else ever again. I'm your world. Nothing else, just me."

The blond puppet nodded obediently. He then inched his face closer to the redhead's, and two pairs of timbered lips met.

Sasori couldn't feel the lifeless mouth Deidara was now kissing him with, but he could feel the content and joy that barely managed to bubble up in his system. He eventually pulled away, still gazing at the blond lovingly, before leading him to a small chair in the corner of the room. Deidara sat in it.

"You will remain in this room for much of your lifetime," the redhead told him, suddenly stern. "You will never look another human being in the eyes ever again. I can assure you that if a mortal ever sees you, they will face my wrath in the worst way possible – they won't even get to become my art, like you and my weapons have. Then again, even if they did come down into this room to look at you, they would still die as their sense of smell would be overwhelmed by rotting organs. Oh, and speaking of weapons, don't expect to be used in battle. To reduce a foolish mortal to nothing is still not art, no matter what way you look at it. Do you understand?"

Deidara nodded, but only because Sasori's chakra strings forced him to do so.

"Now, as much as I hate to leave, I'm afraid I have to meet the other members for breakfast." He disabled the chakra strings and gave his finest creation a final kiss on the temple. "I promise that I will return very, very soon."

-xxx-

Even though Sasori didn't eat, he still attended meals as a sign of courtesy. Every other member of Akatsuki required to eat, so he didn't see why he was exempted just because he didn't. Besides, meals were a good way to tune in to important news from those besides Leader.

When he arrived at the dining room, Kakuzu, Hidan and Zetsu were the only ones present. Apparently Tobi was still asleep, and Kisame, just like every morning, was spending a few minutes trying to free Itachi from his slumber. Sasori and Deidara usually arrived together; Deidara had no trouble waking up early, but he did spend so long worrying about his appearence that he would miss out on breakfast by the time he was done; thus, Sasori had to stay and chastise him to hurry up.

Hidan and Kakuzu seemed to be engaged in a heated argument; Zetsu on the other hand took note of the blond's absense.

"I guess you finally gave up on dragging him over here. **Did you kill him? That would take care of it.**"

"Yes, adding him to my collection did solve some unnecessary morning conflict," Sasori replied without shame.

"...so just go fuck a– wait." Hidan screeched his obscenities to a halt when Sasori's declaration reached his ears. "You killed Deidara?"

Kakuzu's widened eyes focused themselves on the young puppet man. "I didn't think you of all people would take after me," he remarked in his deep voice. "I do know that you turned one of your partners into a puppet, but you never seriously harmed Orochimaru."

"I spent all of last night converting him into a puppet," Sasori confessed.

"Who became a puppet?" Tobi asked curiously as he bounced into the room. "Hey, where's Deidara-senpai?"

Sasori suddenly fixed a fierce glare on the masked boy. Tobi cried out and averted his eyes towards where Zetsu was sitting.

"**Keep calling him Deidara-senpai, let's see what happens!** No, bad idea. **But why no–** Quiet." Concluding the short quarrel with himself, the plant-nin met Tobi's gaze. "Deidara is now Sasori's latest work of art."

"What do you–" The young boy was silenced by his own realisation. The shocked sadness his face now bore was hidden by his orange mask. "D-Deidara-senpai is a puppet now?"

"Yes, and you will never see him again," Sasori confirmed.

"But why? I always get to see your other puppets when we fight!"

"He is not a fighting puppet. He is simply a work of art, a decoration in my workshop."

_Wait until Leader hears about this_, Kakuzu thought. _He sure as hell never let me off easily when I killed my partners._

There were a few minutes of silence then, and it wasn't broken until Kisame and Itachi appeared.

"'Morning, everyone!" Kisame greeted heartily. Itachi, meanwhile, had his Sharingan activated and was anxiously glancing to where Deidara usually sat. The occupants of the table all tensed then, keeping in mind that Deidara had become Itachi's boyfriend only the previous day.

The Uchiha's scarlet eyes turned away from the empty seat and glowered at everyone. His voice held no emotion whatsoever as he spoke.

"Where is Deidara?"

The scrumptious breakfast Kakuzu had cooked suddenly tasted like cardboard to everyone who ate. What Itachi would do when he discovered the truth was unpredictable.

Kisame was looking worried at this point. He looked down at his partner nervously, unsure of what would happen next.

It was Sasori who broke the ice.

"Deidara is mine now."

-xxx-

It wasn't until after breakfast that Itachi peeled his mask off of his face and let it drop to the floor. Screw his cool, calm Uchiha pride, he was livid and he wanted to show Sasori how angry he was.

He didn't pull a Kakuzu and attempt to kill Sasori. He didn't pull a Hidan and destroy his surroundings while spouting every cuss word he knew. Instead, before Sasori had the opportunity to return to his workshop, he pinned the redhead against the wall and almost set him aflame as his red eyes were glaring daggers.

"Where is he?" His voice was still relatively calm, but now it was calm in the sense that he would kill you on the spot and not care in the slightest.

Sasori snarled at the furious Konoha-nin. "I'm not letting you touch him again," he declared. "He doesn't deserve to be in your arms."

"Where. Is. He?" Itachi repeated, now with more menace leaking into his tone.

"If you ever see his improved beauty, you will not live another day."

"And if you don't tell me where he is, I will break you from the inside out."

Sasori smirked. "But you can't break me. I can't feel anything."

Unfortunately for Itachi, Sasori was right. Tsukuyomi would be useless on a puppet. He could still kill him though, if he struck his weak spot – his heart.

"My love for Deidara is about as twisted as yours, Sasori," he found himself saying. "I know who Tobi really is. He is actually Madara Uchiha, who happens to be several decades older than Deidara. You see, my love was unrequited back then, because he was in love with a man who would be committing yet another crime simply by becoming his lover.

"Deidara having these feelings for someone besides myself did not make me a happy man, and my infatuation towards him grew to the point where I wanted to make him mine, no matter what the cost was. So, I used a genjutsu to make him see Madara take that mask off and show him who he really is. In that same genjutsu, I painted myself in a much more appealing light, if only to weaken his hate for me and turn it into love. Of course, the genjutsu was successful.

"I still stand by the belief that love only hurts you. That was why I was so determined to never let Deidara go. Only one day in, and I've already lost him. Sasori, I have never once given the idea of killing you a thought, but right now it sounds like a good idea."

"If I were human, I might actually sympathise with you," Sasori sneered. "But unfortunately, I'm a puppet, and thus I don't see why your little tale is sad in the slightest. My only thoughts are that you should be gone, banished from existence, because you manipulated the brat into seeing false beauty. I have spent all of last night improving the startling beauty he already bears, and only me, myself and I are allowed to see it."

Poor Itachi was the last to find out about Deidara's fate. If Sasori thought the others took it badly, the raven-haired man took it horribly. Numbly, he released his hold on Sasori and fell to the floor, concealing his facial expression.

_He's a puppet_, Itachi realised. _He's a puppet. He's a puppet, he's a puppet, he's a puppet..._ The three words repeated in his head in a maddening mantra.

Sasori produced a kunai from a pocket in his black pants. He moved over to Itachi's side, knelt down, and haphazardly sliced open the nape of his neck. The Uchiha screamed, but it was immediately cut off by harsh coughing. The slasher smile from the previous night was back on Sasori's face as he then proceeded into stabbing deeply in several spots in Itachi's backside. When he was sure he was no longer breathing, Sasori carelessly kicked Itachi's corpse in a corner of the room and went to visit Deidara back in the workshop.

"Guess what I just did, Dei?" he asked as he intimately cupped the blond's chin into his hands. "I just killed Itachi. I hope you're happy."

He knew that Leader was currently thinking of a punishment for him since he'd killed two members, but as long as he still got to have this beautiful puppet nearby, he just didn't care.

-xxx-

_owari_

-xxx-

A/N: There you have it, hope it was good. The story had not one, but two yanderes after all that, but I like to think of my portrayal of Itachi as a subversion or deconstruction of a typical yandere.

Please comment if you have the time, and also, can anyone reccommend some good SasuNaru or SasoDei stories where one or both halves of the couple are yandere? I've seen quite a few SasoDei fics where Sasori was yandere for Deidara, like he was here, but none of them are as good as I would've liked. And I have yet to find Sasuke being yandere for Naruto or vice-versa. I haven't read about Dei being yandere for Saso though, but I can already see how it would turn out. I might publish a fanfic on that idea.

Okay now, no more ramblings. Thanks for reading!


	2. Koda

A/N: So this is just a sort of conclusion that I decided to add on. You're free to ignore it if you wish, however, and count this out in the... continuity-of-sorts.

_Deidara,_

_By the time you read this, I will_ have_ been reduced to the same wooden, motionless state as you are, only with a gaping hole in my chest. I am aware that you cannot even read, but… well, I just need to get this out somehow._

_You should've seen how livid Sir Leader was when he discovered the deaths of you and Itachi. Kisame became pretty much useless after I killed Itachi - they say those two were deeply close friends. Needless to say, Sir Leader realised that all these petty relationships began when he and Konan started being open about theirs. He thus decided to punish me and Kisame with execution before disbanding Akatsuki. I'm currently hunched over my work bench in the worst pain imaginable - and to make matters worse, my emotions filter seems to have worn off. Any moment now, I may die and leave this letter incomplete, so I am writing as fast as my body will allow me to._

_As it turns out, I do in fact love you. That love was buried deep into my heart, where I wasn't able to find it until I regained emotions. All of the things I have done in the past 15 years, I now regret. But most of all, I regret killing you._

_I wish I didn't have to say this, but… you never actually loved Itachi. He used a genjutsu to delude you into loving him. I realise that perhaps the one your heart truly desired was Tobi, but… he's really Itachi's grandfather or something, you know. Or so Itachi says. Maybe he was bluffing. No way I can find out for sure now. Either way, I now know that when you're in love, and you're a puppet, a disaster will easily brew. So I apologise for the trouble I have caused._

_I honestly wish that I can undo these past 15 years. But I cannot, and they will stay with me forever. If I never became a puppet, I might've never met you. Funny, that. If I had the means, I'd be weeping right now. You know what they say… love makes you crazy._

_You were right. Art is fleeting. And so am I, in the end. Not even I can be eternal._

_So I guess I'll see you in Hell, Deidara. I know you'll never love me in any lifetime, no matter what, but… I do love you._

_Akasuna no Sasori_


End file.
